The ((Un)expected) Ending of the PeaceCorps Journey, and a Leap into the Unknown

Well, it's been a while since I've updated, but let's start off with the key point:

I'm not going to be rejoining the PeaceCorps (right now) in Ecuador.

Throughout my long saga of getting sick, being sent home, trying to figure out what was wrong, and doing a three-month shot-in-the-dark treatment, I've been wrestling with the question of whether or not to apply for reinstatement (ie, to get my job back) with PeaceCorps in my previous position.

Because of the illness that I apparently got (Brucellosis - wikipedia will be your friend here), which has taken three months of a cocktail of medications to curb, my doctors have said that it's possible for me to go back, but that they wouldn't recommend it and would state as much in my paperwork. So, I could twist PC's arm, but after so much time away from site, I feel like the timing is bad. My site would benefit from having someone there for the solid two years, and I'd have so much baggage after this whole ordeal that I wouldn't be able to do justice to my magnificent site.



Update about the illness in specifics: Most of my symptoms were definitely caused by whatever bacteria I picked up. It's something similar to Brucella, if not actually that particular bug, as the combo of antibiotics that they tried did the trick. It took over a month for us to see any noticeable results, but GOSHDARNIT I FEEL SO HAPPY TO FEEL NORMAL! Seriously, I feel like a person again, and it's wonderful - even though some things are lingering, I'm so incredibly grateful to be back to the magnificent and wonderful status-quo that I enjoyed without even knowing it before.
My low B12 levels, which has caused a little plaque buildup on my brain, seems to be doing better, but my doctor has said that he wants me to maintain the current regimen permanently - we can try to alter it to a non-injectable, but that'll mean regular MRIs and oodles of bloodwork over the course of a year, so I'm electing to not do that for the moment. But that's definitely one of the chief barriers to PC letting me return without a fight.
The Brucellosis, at this point, seems to have been taken care of. Unfortunately, this is a disease that can recur frequently over the course of a person's lifetime, and often does. Chances are, we've taken care of it, but it could also decide to have some pretty major implications later on that I'll have to monitor. 



It's probably not a huge surprise  that I'm not coming back (as I've been looking for work and have finally moved into an apartment), but this is my formal notice to the world. Everyone has been ridiculously supportive and kind to me while I was freaking out about this throughout the process, and I appreciate each and every one of you and your care.

I'm disappointed that I won't be able to return to Chaguarpamba, as it's one of the most beautiful little towns and provinces in the world - well, of the world that I've had the opportunity to see. The people were kind, the job was just gearing up to be AMAZING, and every breath brought a little sense of the unknown. Hopefully I'll be able to get back to visit someday, but for now, I'll just cherish the month that I had there.


Next steps: Find a full-time job starting around June. I've been contracting with a nonprofit that I used to work with, but that contract will be up in June, so I'm searching high and low for a job - at this point, I'll take anything. I'd really really like something that works with nonprofit development, or in an ideal world, intercultural development and peacebuilding. Location: flexible.
Thank you PeaceCorps for taking away a healthy dose of fear-of-the-unknown. The world is a wider, but less intimidating place for me now. I haven't been able to complete the two-year term for PeaceCorps, but maybe that'll be able happen in the upcoming years.

For now, the future is a complete unknown - it's time to dive into something new.